I don’t know how it feels when a guy finally talks to the lady he is into and she reciprocates, but for us ladies, (let me speak for myself) … it feels soooo sweet when a guy says and does all the ‘right’ things right. Man it feels so awesome!
But when a guy approaches you and his ‘game’ is lacking, it’s not pretty. It’s an ugly feeling. And it doesn’t help much if you own a private jet, yacht or if you are Thor (sorry, Chris Hemsworth), if your game is weak, that’s it. I might have mercy on you and help you ‘chop’ that money, but my heart and contentment would never be yours.
So let’s cut to the chase, you have this senorita you are crushing on, or this lady that you want to date or … that hot babe you want to screw (I don’t recommend this, but, sometimes you just want ‘some’ and that’s all), anyway, how do you get her interested in you and hooked?
First, you don’t want to smell like a he-goat on heat or a sweaty builder. No. You can shower; use a deodorant, body spray, cologne … anything that will make you smell good – always. Don’t overdo it, less is more.
When you smell good, next thing is to work on your confidence. You don’t want to come off as desperate, begging for attention and all. But still, leave the ‘ego thing’ to Kanye, don’t be egotistic. You have to balance. Let the way you talk and conduct yourself show her that it will absolutely be her loss if she turns you down.
If you can make her genuinely smile or laugh, you are doing great. Humor is key. I get it, you are not Will Ferrell or ‘man from Ombokoro’, but you can make a girl smile, right? Loosen up. You know how you crack jokes with buddies or family? Yes, be in that state. But don’t turn into a clown. Ah ah.
Avoid cheap talk, gossip … anything that insults your intelligence. Talk smart and be interesting. Now I’m not saying that you lecture her on photosynthesis, no. Just have adult, meaningful, fun conversations.
So let’s see; you smell good, are confident, you are fun to hang around, sound intelligent and you start feeling like the ‘village chief’. Village chiefs have power but you my friend need to respect your lady. You can’t treat her like trash or anything that’s disrespectful. Shouting at her, acting like she is nothing to you, that will make her run away. We love it when our king gives us the respect that a queen deserves. (and more). The same way you want to be respected, is the same way she wants to be respected. At the end of the day, we as humans have common desires and respect is definitely one of them.
You might respect her, may be you don’t hit her or if you want to do something that involves the both of you, you first talk to her about it, but if she does her hair and you don’t notice or compliment her, it doesn’t feel that good. If you are on a date, put your phone down and focus on her. Not too much, but she will enjoy your undivided attention. You can’t start staring at other women or start talking random stuff about your buddy’s girlfriend. Pay attention to her. Grab the details during your conversations; learn her tiny-tiny habits. Learn what she likes and what she dislikes, focus – on her. It’s the way we (women) are wired, no negotiations.
So let’s say during one of your conversations she mentioned how she likes a certain restaurant or genre of music. May be you noticed she likes a certain type of bags or shoes, surprise her with a pair! Buy her flowers if she likes them. If she loves reading, get her an interesting book. The point is to avoid being predictable. Maybe every time you sleep over at her place, the next morning she wakes up and makes breakfast. Once in a while, make her breakfast as well. Be romantic, not just in bed but every other day. Be sweet and nice to her. Treat her like the only girl in the world, trust me, you reap what you sow.
If at this point all is going well, the last thing you want to do is rush her. From having sex, to meeting friends and family, getting married, having kids … learn to take things slow. If you have been paying attention to her, you probably know some of her goals (life or career), her body language can always guide you … just take it slow and don’t rush into anything.
If she genuinely likes you or loves you and she wants this to work, it will work out.