Many times in relationships people get “”Led on”. In fact, getting led on is not a one-time deal. Neither is it one sided, that men do it and women don’t or the vice versa.
At one point in a couple’s life, a predictable relationship pattern starts to emerge; something like this:
Step 1: She/he starts interacting with you.
Step 2: You get very excited about the prospect of this potential interest, and show some interest back.
Step 3: You (and him/her) start hanging out, talking more often, and interacting regularly.
Step 4: You start reading into this interaction, and dreaming of your future. You continue to give, love, and serve.
Step 5: You both continue to interact.
Step 6: You start feeling confused. Does he/she like me, or are we just friends? Was that a romantic wink, or was there something in his/her eye? Are these dates, or am I just his/her pal?
Step 7: You continue to interact.
Step 8: You feel more confused, but remain silent. But you keep on giving…
Step 9: You continue to interact.
Step 10: And the Grand finale? He/she tells you he/she has a girlfriend, or that s/he’s interested in another boy/girl, or alludes to you being a great sister/brother ()friend zoning) in Christ, or introduces you to his/her crush, or drops off the face of the earth. The end!
Now, that up there, is being “Led on”. When your partner want everything to flow according to his/her mandate and you’re practically insignificant.
Keep calm, I come bearing good news, you can rid yourself of such fellows. Here’s how you can avoid being “Led on”.
Don’t assume; never at any one time lay basis of the relationship you have with him/her on assumption or better still a hunch. Be certain of what you’re doing and make s/he is too.
Seek clarity; Seek clarity where you don’t follow. You may be seen as a nag but it will save you so much trouble that you may encompass in the near future if you don’t.
Accept reality; don’t cloud your brain in a lie and hope that things will work out. If there is no chemistry, let it be. Much as you think you are working out the situation, in the long run you’re abetting his/her mind games and s/he won’t stop.
Find yourself; don’t let your life be lived by the tune and pace s/he chooses it should be at. Compose yourself and move on. We are made independent but lose ourselves trying to entice and impress others. Please don’t.
Change attitude; issues of letting your partner’s state of mind define you, are not cool. Set your standards and live by them. You may be seen as a big headed fellow but you are surely shaping not only your mindset but relationship environment.
Set clear boundaries; right from the start of the affair. Show this man or woman that you’re not up for mind games or any tricks. Show how focused you are and what you want exactly.
If you don’t then you will surely dig a grave for yourself cause your life will be filled with doubts and uncertainty accompanied by immense pain.
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