For someone who grew up with 3 boys, a strict but loving father and a good number of male friends, I stand awed by the “bromance” the male species have! Not that they don’t step on each other’s toes occasionally but i greatly admire how straight up most men are with their guys.
I’m the type of girl who has never really found a problem with complimenting a gorgeously looking woman, don’t get me wrong I’m very comfortable in my skin and could probably do better but I always try and give props whenever i meet another woman who is better than me in various aspects.
However adjusting to my fellow females hasn’t been easy, given the tomboy background i had.
For example, unlike average girls, I find it boring to hang in cliques, do cliquey things together, eat together I’m sure you see what i mean. I do have female friends, acquaintances not sure about haters or frenemies.
I’ve realized that many times, it’s hard to find a woman who genuinely applauds and upholds another in case she is better. There are a few who do but most of us have a long way to go. It’s easier for women to spread trash about others rather than appreciate them.Others will masquerade as friends,pout together in selfies and even post about their “undying” love yet behind their supposedly good friends’ back,is a lot of unmatched hate talk,rumors and dirty scheming.
For instance if a new girl comes into either school, hostel or name it and lets say she’s the type that gets visits and checked on most, you will hear statements like, “that one, she is loose” or “she throws herself at men, that’s why she’s getting all that attention.” Yet the reality may be she is a warm person to be around or probably knows her way around conducting engaging conversations with the opposite sex.
How many times have you heard women bash others and when you sit down to think through it, there’s nothing that the one being bashed has done save for her ability to change her hair as often as 3 times a week or being able to afford that real Givenchy bag that the rest can’t.
I believe every woman is beautiful, strong, courageous and unique in her own right and also acknowledge that we are never going to be perfect! So, as a former tomboy I’ll say this . . .
If you can’t beat them, learn from them! It would make a whole big difference if we learnt to pick lessons from our competition.
If Essie is good at stage presence, instead of spreading Illuminati and w***re stories (forgive the French) how about you found out how she’s able to be that bold? If Liza dresses up like every day is a runway, how about you asked for tips?
I can’t begin to tell you how my life changed when i stopped looking at those better than i as competitions or threats and begun learning on how to brighten my shine. I was surprised that i had something they too could benefit from. And such is life, we are meant to be co-dependent not pull each other down.
You too have something enviable about you, so stop the beef, the gossip and slandering and pull out that match, light your candle and you will be amazed at the difference you will make in another daughter of Eve’s life.
Live and Let Live, it’s a short yet beautiful life to waste on hatred. Now there’s power in that thought, girls!